Storms of Who I am

 As a child, I thought life would fall into my lap just like that on one lazy afternoon:)

I would be someone somewhere.
Innocence made me believe,
School textbook stories are real.
The World is indeed my oyster!

But will I have the courage to show up for myself?
When life consumes me,
Piece by piece, day by day?

I will lose people,
Some to situations, some to death.
And with them,
A little piece of me will go too.

Will I still go on?
Will I still be the person I dreamt of?
Or do dreams change?
Can I change?
Am I willing to change?
For something I now wish for,
Even when the child inside me,
Still holds on to that old version of me?

I don’t know, maa.
I want to. I dread to.
Something inside has shifted.
Strange yearnings consume me.
I know you hate to see the void,
In your little girl’s eyes.

But maa, trust me,
I need to walk through storms.
Storms of who I was,
Who can I be?
Who I wish to be,
And who will I become?

Let me make a puzzle of my life.
Let me scatter the pieces.
I want to see how they find each other again.
It’s a show I too want to watch.
How does my puzzle come together?